I want to answer this honestly, partly from my own experience.

In my mid-twenties, after a difficult relationship, I started having daily panic attacks that took over my life. I was prescribed Xanax almost immediately, with little discussion of any other options - which, at the time and in the country I was living in, was not unusual. Therapy was not really part of the conversation yet.

It helped, at first. It also numbed me - I lost concentration, slept badly, had memory problems, and often felt disconnected from my own body. Eventually, I was able to come off it, and although I have had occasional panic attacks since, I have never gone back to it.

I am not against medication. For some people, especially in a crisis, it can be exactly the right first step - a way to function while you find your footing. But it is rarely a long-term answer on its own.

What I’ve Come to Believe

Anxiety is not something you are born with. It is usually a response to something that happened, and was not fully processed or supported at the time. Almost everyone I have worked with who lives with anxiety can point to a “before” - a time they remember feeling fine. Many have taken Xanax, or still carry it “just in case.” They also know, deep down, that it works like a plaster - it does not touch what is underneath.

There is no single model that works for everyone. Some people find their way through mindfulness, some through structured therapeutic work, some through a combination of approaches over time. My own journey took years and a lot of trial and error, but what mattered most was going back to the actual roots - understanding them, not just managing the symptoms - and slowly learning new patterns in their place: how to breathe properly, how to say what I needed, how to treat myself with something closer to unconditional acceptance.

That is what eventually worked for me. In my own practice, I try to offer that same openness - no fixed timeline, no assumption that your process should look like anyone else’s.

If you are in the middle of that search yourself, I would only encourage you to keep looking for what actually fits you. It is worth it.

Agatha