Haunted by unfinished business?
Each of us went through something in life that we are not proud of. It could have been an experience we don’t want to remember, it could have been a decision we made and we don’t want to be reminded of. If you still find yourself cringing when you think about this, it means that you have unfinished business with the past.
And what does unfinished business mean?
Simply, that it is not finished. And if so, it may occur at the least expected time in your life. Or it can stop you from reaching out for your dreams as you know you would need to confront it before moving forward. Unfinished business weakens us every single time. You can try to forget, repress, deny, even laugh at it – but it will still haunt you when you think about it.
Unfinished business can be compared with buying something with a credit card and delaying the process of paying it off. What happens is, at first we don’t feel we paid for it, until we are facing the debt. Depending on how big the purchase was, we will have to face adequate interest…It will never go away, it can only grow. The same happens with our unfinished business, it can only grow. It will never disappear, dissolve, get forgotten. Never.
The amount of years I engaged in self-punishment, negative self-talk, self-blame, holding on to the feelings of guilt, shame and even self-hatred ruined so many precious years of my life. I did it to myself. I was holding onto the past experiences, by burying them deep inside, all those bad decisions, actions and choices I was ashamed of and felt guilty for. It kept me imprisoned and unable to go for the biggest dreams I had. I was scared of people’s judgement. Until I reached the point where my integrity was really challenged and I no longer wanted to say YES to something I did for far too long. Only then could I change.
A lot of us live imprisoned by the past we try to avoid, forget and bury deeply. But how can we truly live, enjoy life, be happy and successful if we know that we have a huge debt to pay?
Perhaps you experienced something similar and decided that you no longer wish to react with a cringe to your past experiences? You don’t want them to hold you back any more?
I will never forget the feeling of internal liberation I felt when I finally unwrapped my unfinished businesses. It saved me and allowed me to become the best version of myself, it freed me. Remember that once you have dealt with what is inside you, it’s no longer there. And if it’s no longer there, there is a space for something else inside. Nothing is more empowering than to hear your own words out loud bouncing off the non-judgemental energy of the person in front of you.
Some of my relationships ended, making space for new ones to be created, some changed and developed. But most of all I am no longer surrounded by pretence, I gave up on people pleasing I became unstoppable!
Once you have paid your credit card off, you no longer have the debt. You may not forget the feeling of having a debt, but you can now look at your credit card and feel ok with it.
Thank you for reading, I would love to hear your thoughts